Yeah, okay, I'm not buying it either. I'm hanging my head in shame, really. REALLY.
In other news, I spent last weekend partying with a bunch of fellow actor-kids. They're all rockstars, let me tell you. The great thing about hanging around with showbiz people is that there is literally no stigma and no one-upmanship like you'd expect and receive from "normal" types. Pretty kicky, huh? S'mores were made, Apples to Apples (the board game) and Name That Dog (the walking-down-the-street game) were played, an underwhelming patriotic carnival was visited, fireworks were watched, and a good time was pretty much had.
I promise to make more regular entries in this thing! I swear, I swear, I swear. But in the meantime, have some pretty pictures:
Cupcakes, people. They really are the perfect food.
Kelli O'Hara working it in Alberta Ferretti. It's a great silhouette for her, and she looks radiant. Well played, Kelli - you'll win the big prize next time.
Laura Benanti, looking fabulous as always - the color looks great on her, the spangles aren't too much, and the cut befits a Tony winner in the best way. Gypsy Rose Lee would be proud.
Kerry Butler in Elie Saab. Very flattering on her figure (and I am SO jealous of that tiny waist). Not so sure about the purse, but hey, it doesn't ruin the look entirely.
Mary-Louise Parker, looking fierce as ever. Seems like the fashion rule of thumb for the Tonys dictates that the more famous you are, the shorter your dress can be - but she wears it spectacularly.
Kate Shindle deserves brownie points for looking so gorgeous from the neck up...
...but I'm not quite so convinced about the dress.
Classic, clean, and crisp. Well done, Christine Baranski.
Kristin Chenoweth could've done better, but with Cheyenne Jackson on your arm, what could possibly make the ensemble look better?
Rebecca Luker (with super-cool husband Danny Burstein), always the class act. The silhouette is flattering, and the color (is that champagne or taupe?) looks fantastic with her eye color. (Insert a Secret Garden/"Lily's Eyes" pun here at your own will.)
While Kathryn Grody represents the Lollipop Guild, Mandy Patinkin looks a whole lot like the bum who stole my egg-salad sandwich last week. Shouldn't have left Criminal Minds, man.
Oh, Laura Linney. Now, in theory, there's really nothing wrong with this gown, am I right? I mean, fairy-princess cut, lovely paler-than-pale pink color, cinched at the waist - it technically should be on the best-dressed list. But sadly, something went horribly wrong in the execution of this look that has turned La Linney's upper body into a formless, largely colorless square, while the bottom half looks as if she caught the hem in the limo door getting out. Good try, but no points this time.
Hey there, Kathryn Hahn, what have you got hidden under your dress there? Your fellow Boeing-Boeing costars Mary McCormack and Gina Gershon look so darn perty there with their nice long dresses and clean silhouettes. What went wrong? Did the Tony committee not give you enough comp tickets to get your entire family in to see your play win Best Revival, is that it? Are you smuggling one of your nearest and dearest in under that unseemly pile of ruffles? Because honestly, K.Hahn, I'm sure they would've given you an extra ticket if you'd just asked.
You know how Laura Bell Bundy played a psychopathic child star in Ruthless! at age ten? This is pretty much what Tina Denmark grew up to be. Run for your life, Becky Gulsvig!
So one of my favorite times of year is fast approaching. No, not the summer solstice, 4th of July, or any other middle-American summer rites. The reason that the season is so lovely comes but once a year, and it takes over Radio City Music Hall in an explosion of song and dance and fabulousness. Yes, friends, I'm talking about the Tony awards, and in the spirit of the season, here's Alex's Official Prediction Post!
- Should Win: Xanadu
- Will Win: In the Heights
- Should & Will Win: August: Osage County
Best Revival of a Musical:
- Should Win: Sunday in the Park with George
- Will Win: South Pacific
Best Revival of a Play:
- Should Win: The Homecoming
- Will Win: Boeing-Boeing
Best Leading Actor in a Musical:
- Should Win: Lin-Manuel Miranda, In the Heights
- Will Win: Paolo Szot, South Pacific
Best Leading Actress in a Musical:
- Should Win: Patti LuPone, Gypsy, & Kelli O'Hara, South Pacific (in a perfect world)
- Will Win: Patti LuPone, Gypsy
Best Leading Actor in a Play:
- Should Win: Patrick Stewart, Macbeth
- Will Win: Mark Rylance, Boeing-Boeing
Best Leading Actress in a Play:
- Should Win: Deanna Dunagan, August: Osage County
Will Win: Amy Morton, August: Osage County
- Should've Been Nominated: Laura Linney, Les Liasons Dangereuses*
Best Featured Actor in a Musical:
- Should & Will Win: Boyd Gaines, Gypsy
Best Featured Actress in a Musical:
- Should & Will Win: Laura Benanti, Gypsy
Best Featured Actor in a Play:
- Should Win: Jim Norton, The Seafarer
- Will Win as a Consolation Prize for Last Year's Tragic Oversight: Raul Esparza**, The Homecoming
Best Featured Actress in a Play:
- Should Win: Mary McCormack, Boeing-Boeing
- Will Win: Rondi Reed, August: Osage County
*I don't care how stiff and miscast she may have been in the role, it's freaking Laura Linney, and there's really no reason why she shouldn't have been nominated, even though there's no way she would've won with the A:OC ladies in the category.
**Because David Hyde Pierce? Really, Tony voters? Really?!
I probably should call the technical categories, but let's face it, kids: It's 5:18AM on a Saturday morning, and I have no interest in digging deep into my brain to recall all of that information - the acting categories will have to suffice.
Instead, here's the Official (yes, I'm loving the word official today) Tony Awards Drinking Game, as dictated by myself and various other members of BroadwayWorld.com!
- Every time they show Sondheim.
Every time they show Patti.
Every time the In the Heights performers say 96,000.
When introducing a celebrity presenter: "Recently starred in" or "Soon to star in" the movie version of whatever musical.
Every time they refrain from saying the name Macbeth.
Every time they bleep out a curse word from a song and say another word.
Any time somebody says their show is 'groundbreaking".
Any time a presenter butchers someone's name, the name of a show, etc..
Every time a winner says something to the effect of "It's an honor just to be nominated."
Every time a winner thanks someone with the justification of "for believing in me."
Every time someone makes a joke about low ratings.
Every time someone's speech gets cut off.
Every time a presenter wears a hideous dress.
Every time Whoopi makes a vagina joke.
Every time South Pacific wins something.
Every time someone mentions The Little Mermaid/Young Frankenstein.
Every time a Broadway legend appears on stage and there is an applause break longer than 5 seconds.
Every time someone thanks their Dad, because it's on Fathers' Day.
Every time they advertise a show that's not even from this season.
Every time a winner spins the medal on the award.
Every time they mention Glory Days.
Or, if you prefer, just take the Man in Chair route and drink every time someone says "Thank you!"
Now, I've gotta rocket. I've got a meeting with some very sparkly industry people this morning, and I have no idea what to wear - I'm thinking the "I'm Disney kid casual in my polo and jeans but intimidating in my $400 shoes" look is just a tad too precocious.
- 30 Rock and Will & Grace are my favorite TV shows of all time. Grey's Anatomy, Pushing Daisies, and Desperate Housewives are all jostling for second place. I'll always love Law & Order: SVU no matter how outlandish the plots and lame the ADAs get, but as for House - well, we'll always have season 2. I'm also strongly of the opinion that Ugly Betty needs to do some serious retooling to get back on track and re-win my love. Get to it, guys.
- Stephen Sondheim is a genius. Period. If you can't appreciate the brilliance of a show like Sweeney Todd, Assassins, or Company, but really really believe that Spring Awakening, Wicked, and Rent are the pinnacles of musical theatre, you deserve to be locked into a very small room with only a television and the DVDs of Into the Woods, Passion, and Sweeney until you've changed your tune. (Just my opinion, of course.)
- Brands such Juicy Couture and Hollister are abhorrent - heads-up, 14-year-old "fashionistas," they don't make you look classy nor fashionable.
- On the other hand, my favorite designers are Elie Saab and Catherine Malandrino - though I also have a sweet spot for Valentino, Oscar de la Renta, and Miu Miu.
- People I'm a huge fan of and am bound to talk too much about include Tina Fey, Patrick Dempsey, Katherine Heigl (despite the fact that she's almost universally loathed along the blog circuit, I think she's a terribly classy and gorgeous human being), Lee Pace, Jenny Lewis/Rilo Kiley, Jesse Spencer, anybody who was ever on Will & Grace, Michael Urie & Becki Newton, and the brilliant John Doyle, as well as anyone who was ever in anything he's directed.
So there you have it. Keep reading, it may get interesting.